Images and video By: Ivory Door Studio
Hey yall! I know it’s been a while since you’ve receive a blog post from me. Well, I took some much needed time away from blogging and social media. But, I’m back and ready to give you a special dose of truth this week. Today is HutchStew’s 3rd wedding anniversary! As any type of milestone approaches we naturally start to reflect. I’ve been watching “This Is Us” and closely looking at Beth and Randall’s relationship. Last week’s episode had me in my feelings for a few days. This week’s Truth Tuesday I want to talk about our marriage as it relates to Beth and Randall’s relationship, and the moments we saw Us in Them.
If you haven’t seen last’s weeks episode I highly encourage you to do so! In the episode we further learned about their relationship and behavioral patterns. Randall is your quintessential “nice guy”. He’s charismatic, oozes confidence, a people person, draws you in and makes you feel comfortable with him and his beliefs. Ladies and gentleman I just described my husband. Anthony is a true southern gentleman. He says please and thank you while saying yes ma’am/no sir. He holds open doors and pulls out chairs. He’s the type you take home to momma with full confidence she’ll love him.
What caught my eye about Anthony and Randall was that in all their nice guy glory they sometimes tend to forget they’re mere mortals like the rest of us. They don’t do well with true gritty conflict. They don’t mind an argument or a disagreement, but when it’s their ish on display you get things like…
- But I do so many things well why point out that one thing?
- There are some guys that do a lot worse.
- What about your stuff?
Yes, my friends it’s difficult for them to look inward and really break down that they are indeed good guys, but they also have deep-rooted flaws like the rest of us. The annoying part of being the spouse to a nice guy is, in the public eye, you’re always the one to blame. There’s NO way the “nice guy” started anything! I’m here to tell you that’s not true my friends. Hutch has to find a way to reconcile that he’s a nice guy, but even nice guys have flaws and need tune ups.
You know I don’t let myself off the hook on Truth Tuesday, so let me tell you how I saw Sheena in that episode. I also have some Randallisms. I can be emotionally draining. As you know I’ve been going to therapy before it was a cool buzz word. Through my time going I’ve learned to no longer hide my emotions. Chile, I don’t have time to have them strapped down anymore. I let them hang FREE!!! But, sometimes my emotional freedom causes my spouse to pay the cost. I can become too emotionally demanding. It was one thing when I was single and let them hang free. I was home alone and had no one else living in my energy. Now, I’m working to maintain my freedom without having Anthony pay the toll fee. I must learn to maneuver through my emotions while still allowing myself the proper time to process, but become better at effectively explaining myself as I maneuver. Some might be thinking that’s hard work. Well, so is marriage.
Beth and Randall showed us who we are right now. That’s the thing about marriage you continue to evolve. Some of the work is fun and other times somebody is sleeping on the couch while you figure it out. As I think back on our three years of marriage, I wouldn’t say I love him more today than I did on 4-2-16, but I can say I love him differently because we’re different people. There’s not a thing I’d change about our journey so far (except his IG handle, I still HATE it!!!).
Until next time loves…