Images By Ivory Door Studio
A few years into Anthony and I dating I started saying, “love is a space created by two people”. I truly held on to this statement when traversing the unchartered waters of a romantic relationship. We were continuously butting heads, running into our separate corners then coming back just as guarded as when we left one another. Before I get too ahead of myself, let me tell yall about this Truth Tuesday. I want to talk to yall about creating spaces of love.
Last week, I hit you with a Maya Angelou quote and this week I have another one that stuck out when I was thinking about writing this piece, “love recognizes no barriers. It jumps hurdles, leaps fences, penetrates walls to arrive at its destination full of hope. That quote in itself is a WORD!!! It resonated with me because there’s no force on this Earth that can stop love. I could write a whole book about my love for Anthony. It’s easy for me to speak proudly about the valleys and peaks of our love story, but the other day I thought, “why can’t I do this about the love I have for myself?”
The love I give others recognizes no barriers. My love penetrates others’ walls even when it has no business doing so, but yet there are some days when I find it hard to love myself. My love to others is patient, kind and perseveres, but on any given Wednesday my self-love is inpatient, unforgiving and coarse. The love that’s so potent, pure and leaps the highest hurdles to connect to the hearts of others somehow takes days off when it’s time to project it inward.
I’ve thought about why this happens, and my best guess is that it’s easier to forgive others. Initially that thought sounds a bit crazy, but think about the last time you forgave someone. Now, think about the conversation you had with yourself. Did you think, “how did I let them do me like that or how did I let that happen”? I’m sure most of you answered yes.
Last week during therapy, I told my therapist I think I love others so deeply because that’s the kind of love I want from others. I’m fearless in my love of others. I believe we should teach others how we want to be loved, but in me teaching others I’ve neglected to teach myself. *Read that last sentence again*
I’ve acknowledged what I’m doing which is the first step. Next, I must love myself as fearlessly as I love others. How do I do that? I teach myself barrier by barrier until there are no longer anymore barriers for my self-love to leap over before it penetrates to its destination which is my own heart. I can create my own space of love. I’ll keep yall posted, and yall keep me honest on this subject.
How are you practicing self-love?
Until next time loves…