Weekly, I open up and tell my truths. I’m open and very vulnerable, because I’ve reached a level of comfort with myself that allows me to do so. There are more truths that I want to tell, past truths that I want to dive deeper into, but my truths aren’t just mine. Leading a life of true freedom comes at a price. It simply depends on if we’re willing to pay the fee.
Currently, I have a fear of making others uncomfortable. Weekly, I tell you the ins, outs, ups, downs and in betweens and not bat an eye. But, I don’t live this life alone. I’ve encountered others along the way, and they’ve played major roles in my life. The trick is telling enough of my truth to feel some sort of freedom, but also finding a way to protect others around me.
How many of you remember the movie The Best Man? Remember, Harper Stewart wrote a book about his friends? I mean he changed the names and a few other things, but in the end they each knew which character was them, and poor Harper didn’t fair so well. That’s my constant struggle. It’s waiting to be 100% true to myself and my purpose, but not wanting to strip others bare while I’m naked every week.
So, today I’m giving you two mini truths. There’s enough meat on the bones for you to get nourishment from my message, but honestly I’m not providing you the feast I had envisioned. My goal is to one day be able to pay that fee, and just say everything I want to say. You see what I did there? I’m vulnerable enough to admit one of my current struggles.
Mini Truth #1
I write about my mom a lot on the blog, I’ve talked about her enough for you to know I think she hung the moon. One of her greatest qualities is she’s a humble parent. My brother and I can disagree with her and say, “hey, I think you’re wrong because so and so”. If she’s wrong she will apologize and say, “you’re right, I was wrong”. There is only one requirement, we have to be respectful when expressing ourselves. This didn’t start when we became adults, as children we were also able to respectfully disagree with her as well. Since these are mini truths, I can’t go as deep as I want to go, but I’ve struggled with building a relationship with my dad. These opinions are my own! My mother never uttered a bad word in my presence. I share this mini truth, because there is someone out there that’s struggling to build a relationship with one or both of their parents as well. I’m proof that you can continue to try and work on it while living a peaceful life. I know there are many that think when you lack the presence of one parent, that you search for them in a mate. In my case, that’s not true. Anthony and my dad don’t share many similarities. That’s not a dig at my dad, it’s just the truth. This mini truth is to let you know, you’re more than your parents. They help mold us, teach us and even scar us, but as adults we can blaze our own path and not be defined by our parents (good or bad).
Mini Truth #2
There’s love after trauma! I’m very open about my childhood abuse. That no longer causes me shame. It took me YEARS to work through, but I’m on the other side of it. It left me hardened and made me untrusting of others. While working through my issues I learned childhood traumas are tough because a part of you gets stuck at the age of your trauma. The longer you wait to work through it, the longer you’re stuck. I was 27 when I started to do the work, and looking back there were things I was “stuck” doing, feeling, thinking, because I hadn’t dealt with it. Admitting you were taken advantage of in such a personal way is tough, but in order to tackle the situation, it requires a high level or vulnerability and forgiveness. I knew I was really working this thang (I’m southern) out when I was able to let Anthony into my life. I’m referring to the total chaos and disaster my life was back then. I mean letting someone into the unpretty side of you is tough, but definitely needed to grow together. I was so sure of myself, but so afraid at the same time. Later, I realized it was pure bravado! It’s been replaced with humility, love, compassion and yep, you guessed it, vulnerability.
My truths are majority mine, but I’d be remiss if I didn’t acknowledge my openness could be negative for someone else in my life. My goal is one day be truly free and able to pay the fee without being apologetic. Until I get there, I’ll continue to inch to the finish line.
Be bold and vulnerable today. Remember there’s no story you can tell that at least one other person hasn’t experienced.
What would you say if there was no cost associated with FREEDOM?
Until next time loves…
This spoke to me in volumes. Seriously. I have had so much happen in my life and I just can’t even express how hard it has been to overcome the pain and losses. Thank you for opening up for all of us! Right now what I would talk about if there was no cost to freedom would be how difficult it has been being married someone who has a substance abuse problem and the divorce that has consumed my life the past six months. It’s a struggle but this post helps me find comfort. Thank you again.
Tricia, thank you for being open. I know that can be hard so I commend you for it. I’ll be praying for you and here if you ever need to talk. ❤
I love this soooo much! Thanks so much for sharing your truths. It’s truly inspiring.
Thanks love! I appreciate your support.
How awesome of you to open up like this to your readers! You’re one strong lady boss!
“There is love after trauma!
I needed this, at this very moment and it’s crazy because you couldn’t have known that. We fall into so many obstacles and down moments that I guess at this age I have simply forgotten that there will be a light at the end of the tunnel, I just need to keep the faith! Thank you for sharing this!
Tosha, you got this!!! Thanks for your honesty and I appreciate you reading.
So good. Thanks for sharing. There are things I want to share but there is a fear. Maybe one day. Great post.
Yes, one day soon you’ll be able to share.
I appreciate your honesty and the truths you have shared. . As a writer it is hard to reveal your truth without implicating those closest to you. It’s a delicate balance.
Yes, it’s definitely a delicate balance. You’re so right about that.
Thank you for sharing your truths. Your mom sounds like a great woman. I too love my dad, but honestly just started having a relationship with him as an adult.
It can be hard trying to build a relationship with our parents when we become adults. I commend you for trying!
I love that you have this relationship with your mom. That is so important. I miss my mom for that more and more each day. I am also so glad you are living and not letting your past trauma define you.
Thanks for reading!
Being true to who you are and speaking your truth is so important. It can be liberating to your soul.
Thanks for reading!
The truth is so liberating. I try to always speak my truth every day and it feels good to not have any hidden secrets. This is a great post! Thanks for sharing.
Yes, the truth is very freeing. Thanks for reading.
Loving your mother tremendously is admirable. I love my mom too and after reading your mini truth number 1 i though I should give her a call and chat with her about anything on her mind.
She would love that LOL. Thanks for reading.
The best way to live in freedom is to be honest about all of what we are feeling and who we are in the moment. It doesnt have to be right or wrong. It is simply what we feel in the moment and I appreciate your honesty and williningess to open up.
This is so true!!!
There is so much I want to share but haven’t. I’m not sure how to package it up. I know others would benefit from my truth.
Yes, I know they would too.
Thanks for sharing your truths! I love my mom so much as well, she’s the best. Glad you were able to get past your childhood trauma, and I’m so sorry you had to go through it.
Thanks so much!!!
LOVE this! Kudos to you for being open and transparent with the masses. It’s so liberating like you said, and I too try not to share too much that would impact others. Keep writing, this was great!
Thanks so much for your support ❤