All images by Ivory Door Studio
I went through my first real self discovery in 2009/2010. I was foolish enough to think that would suffice. *laughs hysterically at myself* I started 2018 with hopes, dreams and faith just like most of yall, but I’ve recently realized it’s time for me to go on another deployment of self-discovery. I know this one will be more of a battle than the last one, but it should be because I know myself and the world in a different way. This Truth Tuesday I’m putting yall as well as myself on notice that another deployment is coming, but also why it’s needed and great for my soul.
Last year I went to therapy 3-4 times. It’s March and I’ve already gone twice. I had a major revelation during my last session (I’ll share later, haven’t fully processed it). My therapist suggested I start group counseling. My initial reaction was “you’re breaking up with me”. She said we will still have sessions, but for me to truly work through current feelings/thoughts/emotions I really need a different avenue. Yooo, I love my therapist!!!
First, let me say, I’m not depressed. I only say this because some might misinterpret what I’m saying and read into something that’s not there. Hang with me, as always I’ve got a story to tell. I desire and require a deeper connection with myself so I can flourish and get everything out of life God (the Universe or birds and trees…whatever you believe) has for me. I’ve been said to be a person that possesses high intensity. I agree, and I also know that scares people away, and makes me a target to be severely misunderstood. Part of the goal in group therapy is to receive honest feedback from a community (since I currently lack one). That’s a bit terrifying yet exciting at the same time. Terrifying because of my high intensity. I’m going to have to restrain from going deep with every single piece of feedback. Exciting because I’ve never experienced anything like this, and it opens me up to a community of supportive people.
I’m not sure when I’m going to start group therapy, but my second tour of self-discovery has already started. I’ll keep you posted, because I know I’ll have a TON of truths to tell from those sessions. I have a list in mind of what I want to gain from this tour of self-discovery. But, I fully understand what I want and what I receive/need really might be completely different, and I’m comfortable with that. I mean I thought I was going to marry someone like me, but then Anthony happened. You don’t always get what you want, but instead what you need. Listen, if I married someone like me we’d both be flying high in the clouds lol. You have to come down sometimes.
- Fully explore my desire/need/want of community
- Fully explore my level of intensity and recognize situations in which it needs to be diffused but find a way to achieve it without feeling like I’m not being true to myself/beliefs/morals
- Fully acknowledge interpersonal issues I need to face and work through
- Fully experience self gratitude, appreciation and love (Listen, I’m dope)
- Fully process and start the work on my latest therapy revelation (I said start work because this one will take some time to conquer, but I’m fully aware of it).
So, we’ve all been put on notice about my second deployment of self-discovery. The beautiful thing is there’s no time frame and I’m walking into it knowing I’ll have set backs, self-doubt, but as long as I keep pushing through I’ll come out on the other side a better version of Sheena.
Until next time loves…
I think it’s great that you’re going to do group therapy. Having safe spaces to talk freely with people who get us, is something that we all need or should have the opportunity to explore.
I love your honesty and transparenc, I say that every post. Keep going on your journey you’ll find your way.
Thanks! I appreciate the support.
I absolutely love your honesty. You seem like such a real, honest and open person that I would never imagine you don’t have your own community. However, I’m so happy that you recognize that and considering group therapy to help fill that void. I look forward to learning more about your personal growth. It’s truly inspiring and refreshing.
I am those things but also very hard on myself. I’m working through it. Thanks for your kind words. ❤️❤️❤️
I wish you the best o your continues journey of self discovery! May you find fulfillment in the process.
Thanks so much!!!
I’m glad you’re using your platform to discuss these type of topics. I love how open and honest you are about finding yourself.
Thanks Jay! I feel a lot of us are feeling similar but sometimes it can be embarrassing to admit.
I keep telling myself I need to make time for therapy. This is another reminder that I should make an appointment sooner rather than later.
It’s definitely helped me so much over the years
I’m such a talker I feel like I might take over a group therapy. I’m in therapy now and Babe and I go once a week. It is my favorite thing to do honestly. I don’t know why everyone doesn’t just go.
LOL!!! Thanks for reading.
Im so happy you made the decision to go to therapy. Please let us know how group therapy is for you.
I’ll definitely keep you posted
Sometimes I say I am going to go to therapy but then I get scared. Group therapy sounds like a good idea. I hope it works out for you.
I love this. I feel like that’s where I’m going to. Life is taking over and I am not handling it well so I need to work on how to get it together.
You got this ❤️❤️❤️
This is something I’ve been thinking about as well. As a young 20-something, self discovery is VERY important and can be tough and sometimes you need that extra push and people to talk to so you know you’re “not crazy” for lack of a better phrase. Thank you so much for sharing.
Yes, my first one was in my 20s and it was needed. I’m sending good vibes your way. ❤️
You got this! You’ve completed the hardest part and that’s seeking assistance. I’m not sure I could do group therapy but I can definitely see how it would be beneficial.
Thanks for reading ❤️